you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
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