i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize