I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
