Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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