Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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