would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Dick very happy bro
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
