so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
