i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
you inspire me to be a worse person
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize