Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
