So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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