The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Randomize
