my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize