pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
