haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
