after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
