I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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