Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
True strength comes from lack of pants
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
