You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I would fuck him just for his dog
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
