it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
