You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Randomize
