Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
