maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize