I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Randomize
