sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
We don't watch enough power rangers
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
