# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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