Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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