I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize