i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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