ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Randomize