im about as happy as oj after his trial
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
