How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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