I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
