Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize
