dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize
