Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
