even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
