I wish I only lived at night.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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