i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
