All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
