if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
