The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
