More tranny stories later!
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
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