I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
They have beer where we have blood.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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