Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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