so explain again why im purple
no
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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