How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Still dying that you shit outside
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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