You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
You can't just leave with hair like that
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I have fence marks all over my body
Randomize
