Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Randomize
