Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
