You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Randomize
